Showing posts with label memories. Show all posts
Showing posts with label memories. Show all posts

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Sonder

Sonder - n. the realization that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own.

Sonder. You are the main character—the protagonist—the star at the center of your own unfolding story. You're surrounded by your supporting cast: friends and family hanging in your immediate orbit.

Scattered a little further out, a network of acquaintances who drift in and out of contact over the years.

But there in the background, faint and out of focus, are the extras. The random passersby. Each living a life as vivid and complex as your own.

They carry on invisibly around you, bearing the accumulated weight of their own ambitions, friends, routines, mistakes, worries, triumphs and inherited craziness.

When your life moves on to the next scene, theirs flickers in place, wrapped in a cloud of backstory and inside jokes and characters strung together with countless other stories you'll never be able to see. That you'll never know exists.

...In which you might appear only once. As an extra sipping coffee in the background. As a blur of traffic passing on the highway. As a lighted window at dusk...

Friday, February 14, 2014

In Search of Lost Time - The madeleine episode or Involuntary Memory

These are my favorite lines from Marcel Proust's In Search of Lost Time -  Volume I - Swann's Way.  It describes an event where eating tea soaked madeleine triggers unexpected strong vivid remembrance of a childhood memory of eating tea soaked madeleine. Such involuntary memories allow the timeline of the story to randomly shift from past, further past and present.  I think that human memories are non linear and often memories of the past is intervened with memory of further past, having gap in between, and that memory is sometimes connected with the present memories.  Similar literary device of involuntary memories and non-linearity of memories is depicted in Swedish director Ingmar Bergman's masterpiece work "Wild Strawberries". The main character experiences series of involuntary memories in his vivid dreams and it is also triggered by seeing his old childhood home. If you like the following few passages then I recommend you to read In Search of Lost Time (it is Proust's monumental work consisting of seven volumes, swann's way is the first volume) and watch Ingmar Bergman's film "Wild Strawberries".

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Many years had elapsed during which nothing of Combray, save what was comprised in the theatre and the drama of my going to bed there, had any existence for me, when one day in winter, on my return home, my mother, seeing that I was cold, offered me some tea, a thing I did not ordinarily take. I declined at first, and then, for no particular reason, changed my mind. She sent for one of those squat, plump little cakes called "petites madeleines," which look as though they had been moulded in the fluted valve of a scallop shell. And soon, mechanically, dispirited after a dreary day with the prospect of a depressing morrow, I raised to my lips a spoonful of the tea in which I had soaked a morsel of the cake. No sooner had the warm liquid mixed with the crumbs touched my palate than a shudder ran through me and I stopped, intent upon the extraordinary thing that was happening to me. An exquisite pleasure had invaded my senses, something isolated, detached, with no suggestion of its origin. And at once the vicissitudes of life had become indifferent to me, its disasters innocuous, its brevity illusory – this new sensation having had on me the effect which love has of filling me with a precious essence; or rather this essence was not in me it was me. An exquisite pleasure had invaded my senses, something isolated, detached, with no suggestion of its origin. And at once the vicissitudes of life had become indifferent to me, its disasters innocuous, its brevity illusory - this new sensation having had on me the effect which love has of filling me with a precious essence; or rather this essence was not in me it was me. I had ceased now to feel mediocre, contingent, mortal. Whence could it have come to me, this all-powerful joy? I sensed that it was connected with the taste of the tea and the cake, but that it infinitely transcended those savours, could, no, indeed, be of the same nature.

I drink a second mouthful, in which I find nothing more than in the first, then a third, which gives me rather less than the second. It is time to stop; the potion is losing it magic. It is plain that the truth I am seeking lies not in the cup but in myself... And I begin to ask myself what it could have been, this unremembered state which brought with it no logical proof, but the indisputable evidence, of its felicity, its reality, and in whose presence other states of consciousness melted and vanished. I decide to attempt to make it reappear. I retrace my thoughts to the moment at which I drank the first spoonful of tea. I rediscover the same state, illuminated by no fresh light. I ask my mind to make one further effort, to bring back once more the fleeting sensation.

..And suddenly the memory revealed itself. The taste was that of the little piece of madeleine which on Sunday mornings at Combray (because on those mornings I did not go out before mass), when I went to say good morning to her in her bedroom, my aunt Léonie used to give me, dipping it first in her own cup of tea or tisane... But when from a long-distant past nothing subsists, after the people are dead, after the things are broken and scattered, taste and smell alone, more fragile but more enduring, more unsubstantial, more persistent, more faithful, remain poised a long time, like souls, remembering, waiting, hoping, amid the ruins of all the rest; and bear unflinchingly, in the tiny and almost impalpable drop of their essence, the vast structure of recollection...

...And as soon as I had recognized the taste of the piece of madeleine soaked in her decoction of lime-blossom which my aunt used to give me (although I did not yet know and must long postpone the discovery of why this memory made me so happy) immediately the old grey house upon the street, where her room was, rose up like a stage set to attach itself to the little pavilion opening on to the garden which had been built out behind it for my parents (the isolated segment which until that moment had been all that I could see); and with the house the town, from morning to night and in all weathers, the Square where I used to be sent before lunch, the streets along which I used to run errands, the country roads we took when it was fine...

...The sight of the little madeleine had recalled nothing to my mind before I tasted it. And all from my cup of tea...

(You can read the chapter here: http://www.haverford.edu/psych/ddavis/p109g/proust.html )


Saturday, December 7, 2013

Distant Memories

...Memories are not linear. Certain memory is bound to be intervened with other memories that are from earlier ones or from ahead ones. It is understandable that memory from time t , memory of a past, can include memory from time (t-1), memory that happened before that past memory. However, can memory of time t include memory of future, that didn't actually happen? Assume you had a memory of yourself buying a food and at that some past time t you thought you would finish the food before finishing homework. In that past memory, you were just buying food and had planned to finished it before homework in some future. Is this a memory that include memory from future? It seems not, because that future planning is not actually an event that took place, it was just a prediction and therefore it is just a memory of a prediction. Now, what if in parallel universe, that planned future event actually took place and if we include memories from all possible universes then that past memory of yours will indeed include memory of a future in it. However, since that past memory is operating in different universe than the parallel one in which the future event that took place, that future event may not happen at all. It can happen but we are unsure of it in that time, it was just a prediction and not an actual memory as it was in the parallel timeline. Even if it happens, it will not be a memory to a memory that it was still a prediction (something could happen). Then that memory must be a distant memory. Distant because there is no way it can memory, far from it. It occurred in different timeline and in that timeline where the memory took place, that distant memory was nothing but a future event (prediction, planning) that could happen. And if that event doesn't take place in the timeline, then it will become the future event that could have happened. Distant memories could either become "i guessed it would happen" events or "events that could have happened". In either case, it won't be considered as memory in our first memory. It is something that is very close to being something, yet fundamentally something that can never be that something. Our life is filled with this distant memories. 5 min ago i thought i would write all of this in some other way but then now it is written in this way. That writing this in some way is a distant memory of mine, and it became the event that could have happened..... Well of course i made up this distant memory thing... Probably distant memory is some memory that is from many years ago, but I would like to think of distant memories in a way I just explained. Maybe some writer's memory had this distant memory to define "distant memory" in my way but then it became the event that could gave happened.